Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Loneliest thing I have done

I am used to doing things alone. Most of the times. I don't usually have buddies interested in the same things as I am. So, for most of my life, I have been going to places or events alone, and then making friends there. I never really minded it. In fact, I liked making new varieties of friends, in new places.

I am now sitting in a clinic for my immigration medical exam (and blogging on my phone). There are couple of other Indian guys here. They both seem to be here with their wives. Both wives are good looking. As I sit here and listen to them having their idiosyncratic conversations that don't really mean anything, I realize that this immigration thing is the most lonely thing I have doing in my life.

I personally don't know anyone who is doing this alone. Most Indians are married by the time they reach this stage in their immigration process. They do it with their spouses.

I am not feeling lonely only because I am doing this alone. I'm feeling lonely more because I realize that this immigration thing has the potential to put some serious distance between the Love of My Life and myself. Each step, each form, each activity in this process is depressing and tortuous.

I had pretty much accepted that this step would come about 3-4 years from now. But the state department advanced the dates by a huge deal. Why did this have to come now, in the middle of everything else I'm dealing with??


  1. Well the advancement in priority dates is a blessing for some and a curse for some...
    being on the blessed side I am happy but yes

  2. LL.....what about consular processing? It usually is slower and still allows you to maintain the immigration status without hampering the travel out of US. (unless it has changed since 2004)

    GC for me has not helped much. As long as have the option to go out of US at will, i would stall the GC until marriage.

    Good luck,bro

  3. LL,
    Not necessarily, distance. In the scenario, that you find your spouse within US, this is not at all a problem, right?

  4. SK - Consular processing could potentially take years too. I tried to stall my GC processing, but it was not possible. I am completing my 6 years on the work visa this year. So, my attorneys have no choice but to go ahead with the GC processing before my visa expires.

    Anonymous - You probably did not understand my post. I love someone who is in India right now. And, this GC thing has a potential to put a lot of distance between us.

  5. Libran Lover - a GC is like having your wallet. As long as it is with you, you dont notice it. If you dont have it, you panic!

    Good luck with your processing.

  6. Hi,
    This blog was recommended by a friend of mine. I had an idle moment to spare and I glanced thru.I must confess to being intrigued.I chose to comment on this post about immigration and loneliness, because it touched a chord in my own heart somewhere.I think its probably more to do with a sense of alienation and less to do with the actual reality of loneliness.
    Anyways,you have an interesting and unusually sensitive way of looking at things.Keep up the good work!

  7. Sucharita - Thanks for stopping by and for the kind words. I hope you can find more idle moments to keep visiting. :-)

  8. And, I wonder who is the friend who recommended this blog!

  9. Hello!
    Iam back!My friend stumbled upon your blog,because someone gave us a paneerpazham which both of us had never come across in India.
    She googled for info on it, stumbled upon your blog making a reference to it, got reading and recommended it to me.

    BTW,your poetry on "chai..." seems really inspired!

  10. Wow! Someone gave you panneerpazham here in the US? Where did they get it from? Don't tell me they hoodwinked the customs! :-)

  11. LL,
    Sorry to disappoint you- my friends and I are boringly,but without exception,law-abiding!The panneerpazham was sampled at a seasonal exotic fruits display/sale at some park.


  12. Exotic fruits display/sale! Cool! Sounds like the kind of place I'd have loved to visit and sample. Must have been a real extensive and interesting one if they got panneerpazham all the way from India!


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